(12/10/11) - No Wrest for the Wicked.

I quit my job and now I am unemployed.
Suddenly the air feels cleaner, food tastes better (obviously), music sound sweeter and colours are more vibrant.
At least that is what I told to the guy on the park bench next to mine.
Now I know how Andy Dufresne felt after crawling through the shit-filled sewers in 'The Shawshank Redemption'.

The Quest for God (or Gods)

In my quest for truth, I began following a suicide cult.
They accused me of stalking them.

I found Jesus, but then lost him again in a crowd.

I meditated until I gained enlightenment, but when I woke up I forgot it again.

The Scientologists and Satanists think I'm too fucked up to join, I can't be a Jedi unless I can figure out how to construct a light-sabre and I need to work-out more to be a follower of Odinism. 
The Wiccans are too flakey, the Rastafarians keep getting busted with pot and the Jews and Muslims are too damn touchy.

Even atheism is an 'ism' and therefore a belief, thus rendering it a paradox.

What ever happened to religions that aren't fussy about who they accept?

(27/11/11) - Driver.

What I think just before I take the bus on the road:
"Well, Laen is not a thinker, Laen is a driver.
He is a doer. And that's what you need to do.
You don't need to think. You need to drive. You need speed. You need to go out there, and you need to rev your engine.
You need to fire it up. You need to grab a hold of that line between speed and chaos, and you need to wrestle it to the ground like a demon cobra!

And then, when the fear rises up in your belly, you use it.
And you know that fear is powerful, because it has been there for billions of years.
And it is good.
And you use it.
And you ride it; you ride it like a skeleton horse through the gates of hell, and then you win, Laen.

You WIN! And you don't win for anybody else.
You win for you, you know why?
Because a man takes what he wants. He takes it all.
And you're a man, aren't you? Aren't you?"

(05/05/12) - Maths 101

The Thais are doing their best to break the stereotype of Asians who are good at math.

Last night I was on the internet for 78 minutes, at 1 baht per minute and the guy just looked confused, started hammering the calculator, phoned a friend, then announced: 160 baht.

I could feel the school teacher in me rise in my oesophegus and said "no, try again". He looked panicked and called all his friends over.

Soon there were four guys, two with calculators, one looking at his watch with his lips moving and one just pointing at the scratch pad.

I didn't want to be condescending, so I let them nut it out for a bit. Eventually they looked like they had a consensus and showed me a number on the calculator: '4'.

It meant nothing so I told them "it was 78 minutes and at one baht per minute, it is?"

One looked hopefully at me and said "102?"

I said "no - it's 78 baht" and gave them a hundred. When they gave me 10 in change I said "more", so they gave me another 20.
I resisted the urge to give them 8 back as it would only scare them. I thanked them and left.

This morning I went to the reception of my hostel and asked for another 10 days. At 280 baht per night I thought it would be easy.

Same deal. Lots of whacking of the calculator and puzzled frowns. I clenched my fist in empathy for this happy-go-lucky fellow.

At one point I could see him look at the calendar 5th of May and then multiply 5 x 10.

I was grinding my teeth is good natured patience when they, (for there were now three of them), announced "3,500 baht".

20 minutes later they arrived at 2,800 for 10 days, then put down my checking out date as the 12th.

(31/05/12) - Perhentian Kecil Island to Oneself

Just had a great day.

Walked around the island and on one section, I was pretty sure I would die of heatstroke.
It was a jungle trail with the emphasis on 'jungle', and not so much on the 'trail'.

Then I saved a kitten, found a coconut and spent 45 minutes getting into it - the best coconut I have ever eaten, (although I may have been delirious from heat/thirst), then met some really nice people at an eco-resort, had a much needed swim on a totally deserted bit of beach off the trail and then found and ate a wild pineapple and some bananas, unless I imagined it all and am still lost in the jungle, writing this in my own urine on a rock.

However, I'm pretty sure that I'm now in an internet cafe watching the prettiest sunset I can remember.

The Sun is just sitting on the sea like a blob of molten metal, small dramatic islands are in sharp silhouette and everything is a soft, golden colour. Some tourist just took a photo with a flash.
Will head off for something spicy now. Hope you all had a good day too.
Goodnight Tassie, stay warm.
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